In another edition of Things Rammi Doesn’t Understand, I present to you my puzzlement over people who post song lyrics as status updates.

I get it. You’ve had a really rough day/are completely in love with your new date/just want to share something with everyone on a social networking website. But instead of getting on the computer and typing, “I’m feeling really crap and need a hug/I love this person so so much and they’re a really good shag too/I just took a really large shit but it won’t flush,” you post an obscure lyric from a song that “really means something to you” (excuse me while I barf).

The confused friend who reads said status update which contains “what happened to my heroes, they seemed to disappear / the idols keep on singing, but they don’t sound sincere” is then left to figure out why the other person has posted that. Are they depressed? Do they want to be left alone? Should you call them and make sure they’re all right? Or are they just in the mood for funky rhyme?

Mmm, funky rhyme.

The sane thing to do would be to ignore it, right? The problem is, some of my friends need guidance away from sharp objects making contact with their skin, and other fun matters. So if you don’t talk to them when they’re feeling down, aforementioned sharp object will make contact, and/or certain medicinal products will be ingested in large amounts.

Guys, when you post song lyrics, bear in mind that the song may not actually mean what you think it means. “Your song” might actually be about the songwriter masturbating.

If you really need to share your feelings via a song lyric, please consider posting something obvious to your friends. It will cause them to facepalm less, and will more easily attract hugs/”Awwh!” comments/constipation remedies from them.