This post should really be titled, “Things I’ve found that irritate me on Plurk,” but I digress. It’s really been a learning curve these last few weeks, learning good and bad plurkiquette / petiquette / pletiquette / I-can’t-be-bothered-to-make-up-a-word-that’s-about-Plurk-etiquette.

Plurk. The good, the bad, and the Shrek-style ugly…

Please note that if I singled out one of your plurks as an example of ‘bad Plurking etiquette’, I’m not trying to be mean. It’s just one of the things that I find really annoying/one of the plurks my anonymous researcher came across. However, if you do feel offended by anything in this post, feel free to block me/remove me from your friends list/write several plurks about what a mean bitch I am. If you’re that sort of a person, I wouldn’t want you in my friends list anyway.

Before we start, you should know that I like to keep my timeline interesting. Whether that involves getting song lyrics stuck into my head,sharing cool food combinations or repeatedly posting bad jokes, I’m all for it.

What I find irritating is people using Plurk as a replacement for IM. I find Plurk is a cross between a chatroom and a message board, but it doesn’t mean it has to be a place to act like you’re mid-conversation with people, and someone will care if you vanish. Neither is it your mental action planner. [@Copyrite's and @loquacious's words, because I was going to say something a lot more explicit.] :s_dance:

Here’s the deal. I don’t give a damn if you ‘BRB’, ‘BBL’ or ‘G2G’. If you’re going to vanish, at least do it in an interesting manner, and give details of where you’re going, or why. No, I don’t want to stalk you, but surely this plurk makes you want to reply more than this, this, this, this or this?
Also, while we’re at it, unless you’re gonna give us a webcam show of it, nobody wants to know you’re in the shower. -.- [Once again, @loquacious's words.]

If you are close enough to someone to care about when they come and go, there’s software for this sort of thing. It’s called MSN/AIM/YIM/IRC/Jabber/Google Talk/etc. You could also separate people the people who actually care out into cliques and private plurk them.

Learn how to use these options, instead of spamming up my timeline.

I’ve also learnt is that some teen plurkers can be really irritating. I know I wrote a blog post on Why Age Shouldn’t Matter a while ago, and I know I’m generalising now and completely contradicting everything I said in that blog post, but how can I (and other people) not, when we meet such idiots on the web? I see why people are reluctant to be friends with people of my age, because sadly, most of us are still immature dicks.

Some of the people I’ve ‘met’ – and you’ll know who you are – seem incapable of typing a sentence without tildes. Yeah, once in a while is OK, but would it kill to put a full stop? Can you not type the word ‘drama’ without it turning into ‘dramz ~’?
They also have this strange lovefest going on with things that they own/make. Whenever someone posts something that they’ve made, and ask for opinions, whatever they’ve made will never be 100% perfect. No one can do that. Instead of being given constructive criticsm, however, their plurks turn into an “OMGz, this is awesome!” and an “I love this so so so so so much!” thing.
When I, or another person, don’t say “this is amazing”, and actually give some suggestions as to how it could be improved, we get attacked, until I cease to care in the end. I know what I do isn’t perfect, and I’d love the chance to be able to improve. In the long run, I won’t learn with people blatantly lying to me about how good something is. These people rally around and attack someone who may have a different opinion to them, and it’s just disgustingly childish.

@loquacious would also like to add that another major annoyance about plurkers that gets her is the fact that some find it absolutely necessary to post lolcat pictures (not including the official icanhazcheeseburger account), xkcd and Kris Wilson comics, because, yanno, we couldn’t possibly ever type in the URL and check it out ourselves, could we? No, absolutely not. For God’s sake people, just stop spamming up our timelines with images we could see for ourselves if we wanted to, okay? It’s also a good idea to read a plurk properly before responding, because if you don’t, you end up looking stupid.

Last of all, what would a Plurk learning/ranting post be without a comment about karma? Some care about it, some don’t. For those that do care, however, please stop doing your stupid little karma maintenance plurks. Karma only goes down every 12 hours now anyway, so your plurks are pointless.

Before I go, please remember that I still love Plurk. It’s just some people that are making it hard for me to enjoy it as much as I used to. :s_annoyed: